Have you ever tried to spare someone’s feelings during a breakup by saying, “It’s not you, it’s me”? Well, when you dump OCD for good, go ahead and tell the truth: It’s you, OCD, not me.
Dr. Lee Baer, OCD specialist, Harvard professor, and author, titled his book about intrusive thoughts The Imp of the Mind. That’s what OCD is–an unwelcome little devil that needs to be cast out with no pity. You don’t need to be polite to this rude guest. While I’m not one for making excuses, I definitely blame OCD for every terrible obsession that’s plagued me.
But I haven’t always had this clarity: Before I was diagnosed with OCD I blamed myself, even though I didn’t understand what, if anything, I had done to deserve the intrusion. I felt helpless and scared. Then I met a psychiatrist who looked at me with compassion and told me I would be all right. Since I had taboo obsessions (Baer uses the categories of violent, sexual, and blasphemous, but I suffered from the latter two), my doctor recommended that I read The Imp of the Mind. It was the best prescription ever. For the first time in my harrowing journey with OCD, I felt less alone. Here was a man who had heard everything from his patients with OCD and didn’t seem to bat an eye. Worried you might want to have sex with your dog? We can work on that. You’re a priest who can’t stop staring at women’s breasts? Don’t feel bad.
Dr. Baer knew how tortured his patients felt, and he helped ease their pain. He did the same for me when he documented many of their stories in The Imp of the Mind, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to thank him enough. So when he contacted me and asked me to share my story on his new website, I jumped at the chance. His contributions to the OCD community helped save me and made my life feel worth living again. Now I had the opportunity to help him.
OCD doesn’t define me, and it shouldn’t define you, either. You can take it down to size.